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changing it up and keeping it fresh

February 13, 2011

I have not yet and am not about to go fully public on how I  feel about the eating plan I am on/support/get paid to chat about, whether it be good, bad or other…. erm… but i feel i am getting a bit same ol’ same ol’ and need a change.

Much like changing a lounge room around – it always feels good to walk into the room and be surprised by how fresh and ‘new’ it looks and feels, and to watch the tele while facing a whole new aspect of view is always a grand thing!

So I need to ‘move the lounge around’ and think other thoughts.

and you know while this is my personal blog and I should be able – free even – to say all that i want without recourse…well when it comes to employment –  the rules change dont they 😕

I am still wanting to lose more weight {who doesnt these days} and still want to move more and tone up and remain fit – so I am just turning the wheel and moving on refiguring how I am going to do that.

Tonight I am reading a book I got for my birthday last year {eeeek year before even} and gaining inspiration from her greatness, loveliness and helpfulness.

Tomorrow my pedometer goes back on.

Tomorrow morning I walk again – and will run for as long as I can 🙂 yes the foot has healed – but I will take it easy.

Tomorrow I have planned to take my food with me, to be more conscious and to keep the sugar out of my system.

I feel good at the moment – having done nothing either terrible or fabulous food or exercise wise this last few days – but I do feel time ticking on and I want to feel great again.

I did have a few down days late last week – and sometimes feel I am bordering on depression. It is not a nice place to be and can feel that it would be an even worse place to slip into. After a tough year – perhaps the toughest of my life – I do not need the extra challenge that depression would bring into in my life.

To keep me out of this place I know I need to keep on top of things by exercising often and being more organised in my daily food – both which leave me feeling positive and happy, not wasting time on this ‘ere computer, hugging and listening to my children more and keeping the lines of communication open between J and I.

Internal conversation can be is my undoing.

I also need to come here and talk more to me.

I read AFG blog today and I agree with what she has to say about her own blog, and it has changed my focus on who I am ‘writing’ to and what I want out of mine.

I also love her spunk! I love how she puts her words out there and in my mind I am like her – but sometimes my public face does not match – and I want it to. This too is part of the issues of late last week – I do not speak out enough and I let people hurt me.

And you know what…

I dont deserve to be hurt like that anymore.

I want to be surrounded by people and friends who care enough to say hello, to include me in their daily lives, to answer my texts and to be nice to me.

I am a nice person. and I am worthy of all of this.

from here

So – in keeping it fresh and changing it up. I will and I am.

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